Gome of the Week
Man, the media is just never going to let her live down that bottomless scene she did in Short Cuts, are they?












This Week's Link That's Probably Not That Great
Karin - a reverie - Sweet ride.


This Week's Movie You've Probably Never Seen
Judgment Day (1999)

When Mario "Peebs" Van Peebles puts on the dreadlock wig, you know you're in for something special.

In this flick he plays Thomas Payne, a religious cult leader who finds out about a meteor that's going to destroy the earth. And this guy's such a dick, he doesn't even wanna stop it! In fact, he's welcoming it because it will be "exercising God's will" or some shit like that.

Problem is, the rest of society would probably like to live, and the military doesn't want to tell the public about the meteor because of the inevitable panic it would cause. Oh, and Payne has kidnapped the one dude who knows how to work the device that can intercept the meteor and blow it up/save humanity.

So, the top military brass does what any high-ranking officials would do: they call on a female FBI agent who once worked on a case trying to nail Payne, and ask her if she can maybe track him down, rescue the scientist he's got stashed, not let the world explode, and remain tight-lipped about the whole sitch.

She's down, but only if she's allowed to take Ice-T out of prison to help with the mission. He used to be mixed up with Payne, until he took the fall for him and ended up behind bars. Now he's got the opportunity for some payback, and if he ends up saving Earth while he pulls the trigger of a gun that's jammed up Payne's ass, all the better.

Ice-T plays a street-smart thug in this movie, and I know what you're thinking: hey, that's a stretch for the T man! Yes, he's really firing on all cylinders for this one. But he digs down deep and actually makes us believe that he understands how crack dealers operate. A powerhouse performance.

I love movies from this era, because the CG is shitty, but not really shitty, so when they blow up the entirety of San Francisco, it's actually pretty sweet looking. And Peebles just pours it on as the cult leader. It doesn't hurt that he's got Tiny Lister as his henchman. Oh, and Coolio shows up for one short scene where he promptly gets riddled with bullets. I'm always for that.

Here's the trailer. See if you can spot Brandon and Brenda's dad from 90210!


This Week's Record You're Probably Not Listening To
Alen Robin - Naked Really Naked (1976)

You may remember Alen Robin from Week 342's record, Welcome to the LBJ Ranch. This LP is the same sort of setup, with Robin taking tape recordings of famous politicians and doing comedy sketches with them. But it's over a decade later, so not only had the technology improved, but Robin had clearly mastered the process, which must have been a substantial undertaking at the time.

I'm not saying I'd sit around and listen to this today, but back in '76, this was probably some pretty cool shit to toke a lid of grass to.

And if I could find some audio online for it, you could light up, you dirty hippie.




This Week's Hip New Slang Word or Phrase
thrashsterpiece - A sweet way to describe a great thrash-metal album.

Origin - Vokillist Dr. Fukk and Guitarist Hellvomit Sodomizer.

Usage - "Oh, dude. Where have you been?"

"Dude, I've been in the garage lifting weights and listening to Kreator's Extreme Aggression on repeat for the last six hours."

"Dude, you just loop that shit?"

"Dude, for a thrashsterpiece like that? Uh, yeah I do, dude."


This Week's Top Ten List

The Top Ten Nicknames I've Come Up With For My New Cat, Brick:

10. Brick Springfield
09. Brick Steiner, the Cat-Faced Gremlin
08. Brick Breuschel
07. Brick Roll, Hashtag LOL
06. Brick Rude, The Sexiest Cat Alive
05. Brickey Nelson Henley Henderson
04. Brick Martel, one half of the Cat-Am Connection
03. Brick Dees
02. Prog-rock keyboardist Brick Wakeman
01. Bric Flair

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