09.07.08

Gome of the Week
Ric Flair's daughter's boyfriend roughed Ric up over the weekend. While this is not an official post-brawl photo of the incident, I'm assuming it's not far off. This guy's head bleeds from finger flicks. Apparently his daughter kicked a cop and had to be tased. It's good to see Ric is able to enjoy his retirement. You know, really get away from the drama and violence of pro wrestling.

 

 

 

 

 

This Week's Link That's Probably Not That Great
Polish Film Posters - Suitable for framing.

 

This Week's Movie You've Probably Never Seen
Heart (1987)

Man, I haven't self-scanned a video in quite a while. It takes me back to our early days, when you couldn't find photos of everything on the internet. Anyway. Brad Davis is the dude from Midnight Express, which I remember him being fairly good in. Not so much here, as he plays an aging boxer who thinks he has a shot at reclaiming some of his previous glory. He hooks up with a young promoter (Steve Buscemi) who is as crooked as the day is long. Confusion and trash talk ensue, and he finds himself unknowingly in the middle of a fixed fight. Will he take a dive? Or will he hold onto his pride while mustering every bit of strength he has to beat his younger, crazier, and better opponent? I won't give away the ending, but I seem to remember Buscemi's last scene involving his character getting tossed in the back of a windowless Econoline van by some revenge-thirsty street toughs. So, you can probably put it together.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This Week's Record You're Probably Not Listening To
Stallion - Stallion (1976)

This is why I spend my free time scouring record bins. There are times when you come across a record that you didn't know existed; a record that is too perfect.; a record that is as old as you are and has somehow eluded your grimy grasp for an entire lifetime. This is that record. You have no idea how happy I was to find out there was a legitimate band named Stallion. With a debut album titled simply Stallion. With a picture of a huge fucking stallion on the front of it. It may never get better than this for me. That's what I thought. Until I turned over the LP and found that their pedal steel player's name is Don Buzzard. Life is good. The music on here's not bad, either. Mid-70's session cat puss rock. You can smell the Thai stick.

 

This Week's Hip New Slang Word or Phrase
teabaggery - A sweet word to describe situations that are reminiscent of a sweaty teabag session, but don't involve any actual teabagging.

Origin - Sometimes, it just makes sense.

Usage - "Dude, these super bros are broing the bro out of bro."

"Dude, you are losing it. We've got to get you away from these bros!"

"Dude, I agree. This place is full to the brim with rampant scenes of teabaggery!"

"Dude, I'll go warm up the Le Car."

 

 

 

This Week's Top Ten List

The Top Ten Ways To Get Clean Without Showering:

10. Get some o' dem jumbo-sized pre-moistened towelettes
09. Lick the side of your hand and rub it on your ears, cat style
08. Wait for your neighbor to wash his car, run outside and insult his wife until he turns the hose on you
07. Shatter your fibula with a large hammer. They'll have to wash you off a little before they put the pins in your leg
06. Take a dip in some raw sewage. Next thing you know, you'll be at the police station getting your outer layer of skin peeled off by a bunch of dudes with industrial strength pressure washers
05. Fall asleep curbside, hope the street sweeper comes by
04. Bring a bar of Dial to that fountain in front of the retirement community
03. Ask the hooker to wet the towel before she whips you with it and stuffs it in your mouth
02. Spray some Windex on your pits
01. Just stuff some dryer sheets down your pants. You'll smell fine

 

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