07.29.07
Gome of the Week
I guess it's cool to talk through movies now. Because whenever I go to one, that's what people do. I like when they repeat the lines that the people in the movie just said. It's fucking awesome!
This Week's Link That's Probably Not That Great
Sly Records on Wikipedia - Yeah, that's right.
This Week's Movie You've Probably Never Seen
The Confessor (2005)
So, it's Christian Slater. And he's a priest. Seriously. Christian Slater and he is a priest. And he is investigating another priest who
may or may not have killed a gay prostitute. And don't forget. He is a priest. Now, this movie really wasn't as bad as one would think.
Of course half way through watching it I realized that I had already seen it like six months ago, which is really I think the first time that that has ever happened to me. So take that as you will. But golly it was great the second time around.
Love, Biff.
This Week's Record You're Probably Not Listening To
Company Car - Collars (2007)
My friend Dave's band. They just played here last night and were fantastic. Do you like the rock music? Do yourself a favor and check this bad boy out.
This Week's Hip New Slang Word or Phrase
expanding a stub - A nerdy term for sexual arousal.
Origin - Wikipedia.
Usage - "Dude, the 200th weekly update of slyrecords.com was trump teez, but we've got to move on."
"You got that right. I'm going to gather up the dude patrol and meet some tail tonight. Some intelligent tail."
"Really? You're through with the 'roke hos, huh?"
"Yup. I want a girl who can reformat my hard drive and then, clitorically speaking, expand my stub."
This Week's Top Ten List
The Top Ten Ways You Can Tell I Hate You:
10. I stab you with a rusty fork
09. You say: "Hey, what's up man?" And I say: "Hey, not much, guy that I hate."
08. I'm peeing on you right now
07. When I'm at your house, I use your fancy guest soap. On my anus.
06. Whenever I'm wearing my novelty shirt that says "I'm with this dude that I hate" and has an arrow pointing to my left, I always make sure to stand on your right, so that the arrow is pointing at you, the dude that I hate.
05. When people ask me what you look like, I show them my balls and say "This, but gayer."
04. I had your likeness airbrushed onto a punching bag, and then blew it up
03. My license plate reads "I H8 U"
02. When people ask me what I really hate, I say "Can it be a person?" and when they say yes, I mention you
01. When describing you, I often rely on the phrase "Surprisingly hateable"
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