Gome of the Week
Bret Michaels' new reality show, where he'll have to find an excuse for wearing a hat while he's fucking in a hot tub.
This Week's Link That's Probably Not That Great
Wookieepedia - How did I not know about this?
This Week's Movie You've Probably Never Seen
This movie is much funnier than it looks. Even Ray Romano is funny in this. I repeat, even Ray Romano is funny in this. That should have been the movie's tagline.
This Week's Record You're Probably Not Listening To
Kool G Rap & DJ Polo - Road to the Riches (1989)
The debut album that could never be topped. Is the cassette in my tape deck in my car right now? You bet it is.
This Week's Hip New Slang Word or Phrase
the fauxhawk yahtzee - When you manage to spot five fauxhawks in one room.
Origin - Douchebags.
Usage - "Dude, clitorically speaking, your lbst is getting pretty good in the back."
"Thank you. But it's nothing compared to your ironic moustache."
"Well, looks like your friends have arrived. And... yep, that makes five. I gotta go. But mark me down for a fauxhawk yahtzee."
This Week's Top Ten List
The Top Ten Things I Will Miss About Cassettes:
10. That warm, welcoming hiss
09. Fast forwarding and rewinding makes for long enough breaks for awkward silences, but not actual conversations
08. Metal or Dolby? It's decision time
07. Reconstructing damaged tapes until the skin is worn off the pinky
06. Mixtapes from ex-girlfriends that I lied about listening to
05. Drop kick 'em, let 'em fall in the toilet, they'll bounce right back
04. "Demo tape" sounds so much cooler than "Demo mp3"
03. Eating the gluestick while crafting handmade covers
02. If needed, the tape can be used to garrot an enemy
01. Flinging them at people's necks like throwing stars
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