Gome of the Week
Old senile people who drive:
One of your own on the right here mowed down 55 people at a farmer's market in California.
Let's get these fogies off the road. Just take my movie ticket, tear it, and then take the bus home.
This Week's Link That's Probably Not That Great
Top 100 Train Wrecks of the 20th Century - And we're not talking Amtrack. We love lists.
This Week's Movie You've Probably Never Seen
Bad Trip (1988)
Atlee Hammaker and I bought this one years ago for two dollars and I have probably watched it about 12 times since then.
The beauty of the film is that, contrary to what the box promises, there really are no bad dudes, bad blood, or guns of any kind. In fact the hero is some kind of accountant who I think fires a gun once on purpose. It's all about cocaine smuggling.
Most action B-movies are.
This Week's Record You're Probably Not Listening To
Sone - Holiday and Sport (1996)
Perhaps the best example of an awkward sophomore album that I have ever seen. Sone was the brainchild of Aaron Day but also involved three out of four future members of Portland's most legendary band of dishwashers, The Feelings. Pat played drums, and occasionally you could hear Ralf playing bass or Tim talking into the microphone.
Well, Sone's first record was pretty solid. Then they released Holiday and Sport, which is a seven song EP, on double vinyl. Tracks one through six appear on the first record. The second record is clear and one sided and contains ambient noise. In fact, apart from the actual song "Holiday and Sport", which is by the far the best thing they ever did, the rest of the EP is pretty rough and electronic. However, how can you argue with lyrics like "Champagne and cocaine, what a life"?
Needless to say, the album pretty much killed their career. It's still a worthwhile piece of Portland dishwasher rock history as Aaron Day would produce half of the Feelings' first album and the entirety of their quintessential Dearling Darling.
This Week's Hip New Slang Word or Phrase
sacktacular - You don't want to be down with the sack.
Origin - The Deep South.
Usage - "Dude, that coug I was with last night had a severe case of gomeosis. She was a bob at being untight."
"Totally, dude. She was sacktacular."
This Week's Top Ten List
The Top Ten Things I Learned From TV This Week:
10. The BK Whopper is for hard core rappers only
09. Me and my buddies + Coors Light = Incestuous twins
08. The first season of the Simpsons is quite awkward at times
07. Whoopi Goldberg is back and she's got some brand new "white people are funny when they do this" quips
06. Some dude found a mouse in his Wendy's chili and was surprised
05. It's totally cool to order a beer at lunch with your boss, as long as some Colonial gent toasts you from the bar
04. I miss the shit out of Andy Richter
03. That weird new rule in the All-Star game actually made it a better game
02. Speaking of that: Barry Bonds is still a cross-earringed choda boy
01. The Arby's oven mitt needs his own movie, solid!