07.21.02
Gome of the Week
Alright, we all enjoyed our time with this crazy, dysfunctional family, but now it is time to part ways.
Leave it to MTV to take something that was kind of funny in the beginning and beat it so far into the ground that this shit should never see the light of day again.
I don't even watch MTV and I've seen every episode of the show like 4 times.
And the daughter covering a Madonna song that pretty much sucked in the first place?
Fuck that.
This Week's Link That's Probably Not That Great
The Ultimate Warrior - Anyone who watched wrestling in the 80's knows that the Ultimate Warrior was a freakshow. Well, he still is and this website proves it. Apparently he's not very ultimate when it comes to updating it, though.
This Week's Movie You've Probably Never Seen
Pink Lady...and Jeff (1980)
Oh, doctor. It's Pink Lady...and Jeff. Do you not know who Pink Lady is? Well, no one else did either when they were given their own TV show in 1980. Turns out they're a duo of Japanese lounge type singers who couldn't speak a lick of English, so they teamed them up with a comedian named Jeff Altman that no one knew either, and boom! The show got canceled after five sweet episodes. But, as usual, Rhino was there to scoop it up 20 years later and release it on an ultra fat DVD set.
Features the early work of Jim Varney and a lot of other super awkward moments like appearances by the Hef and Red Buttons.
Actually so lame that it rules.
This Week's Record You're Probably Not Listening To
Sweep the Leg Johnny - Going Down Swingin' (2002)
Sweep's back and by God, they've done it again. I fear that this will be their last record, judging from internet rumours and the title of the damn thing. But this long ass CD/X2 LP kicks a lot of shit.
Math rock at it's finest.
Oh yeah, and the first song is called "Sometimes My Balls Feel Like Tits."
How can you not love that?
This Week's Hip New Slang Word or Phrase
hater shades - The eyewear of choice for haters.
Origin - I hear that people in Pawtucket say it quite a bit.
Usage - "Dude, that new P. Diddy video with Ghostface is trump teezee!"
"Dude, that shit is really, really, gay."
"Dude, weak. Remove the hater shades and step aside."
This Week's Top Ten List
The Top Ten Lines of Poetry From Henry Rollins' Book Now Watch Him Die That Contain the Phrase "fucked up":
10. "I look at women and feel disgusting like some fucked up animal"
09. "If a woman is attracted to me I think she's fucked up"
08. "I have fucked up thoughts all the time"
07. "At this point I am the most fucked up person I know"
06. "It's so lonely and fucked up here"
05. "Why am I so fucked up?"
04. "I don't need them to fuck me up"
03. "Man, they'll fuck you right up"
02. "I never set out to be so fucked up but I ended up fucked up"
01. "I'm pretty fucked up I guess"