2000-2006, 2012
Members:
biff pocaroba aka eroc the white mystery
Johnny Wockenfuss aka The BTB aka B-Dog
Guest appearances:
C-Dog aka DRZA 3:16 aka Atlee Hammaker
Oatmeal aka Jose Oquendo
ONUG aka Joaquin Andujar
Stepdaddy aka Manny Trillo
Kay Bee tha Qwiet Storm
BAM the Diabetic Superhero
Half N Half
CAC is probably the most well-known of all the Sly Records groups, though that’s not saying much.
What started as some downtime basement tomfoolery between two brothers turned into something we never could have imagined: we put out a CD, played a bunch of shows, and had a really fun time. (A note to all burgeoning music groups - set your sights low. You’ll feel like a star when the littlest things happen.)
CAC started, from the best of my recollection, around the beginning of 2000. We were bored and restless; we needed something to do. biff and I eased into it initially, not too concerned with fidelity or substance. But once we got going, it was too much fun to let go. We picked up some better equipment, held many an all-day writing/recording session, spent way too much time in biff’s dank basement, and somewhere along the line, came to the humble realization that we weren’t terrible. This small bit of self-realized confidence led to even more productivity, and even a bit of collaboration. We got some friends involved, pored over the same songs for more than a year, and eventually decided we wanted the world (or at least our friends) to hear it.
When the day finally came, after what seemed like an eternity, and the Cool as Cucumbers CDs were in our hot little hands, I think we shared a feeling of unparalleled satisfaction and utter fright. We both became quickly convinced, and I’m not being coy when I say this, that no one (excluding our highly supportive girlfriends) was going to give a shit about it. We figured we’d play one show, sell a few sympathy discs, and that would be that. We did play a show (video on the left), and it went well. When we were asked to play a party as our second show, our wildest dreams had already been realized. (Again, refer to my advice above.)
Using the second show as a jumping off point (full disclosure: the party was being held by a guy who was on the CD), we just kept going. Over the next four or five years, we played some 50+ shows. Some were bad, some were good, and honestly, all were memorable. We met a ton of great people, a few assholes, and saw more of our friends than we ever thought possible. We were lucky to have a small but dedicated fanbase, guys and gals who would drive for an hour to see us play for 30 minutes on a Sunday. It was sweet.
We never sold a lot of CDs, but I was pleasantly surprised at how many we were able to get rid of. I was both distraught and satisfied when, years later, I saw a CAC CD in the bargain bin of a record store I frequented. We were right where we belonged: mixed in with all the other stuff nobody had ever heard of. The crowning moment of my music career was when a guy came up to me in a record shop and asked me if I was in CAC. It is sad how much I enjoyed that. We also made it onto local campus radio, got a few blurbs and some pictures in local papers, were honored to play at a friend’s wedding, and opened up for one of our heroes, Ralf Youtz (Built to Spill, Halo Benders, The Feelings). Seriously: sweet.
We kept recording, though not at a pace to be too proud of. We finished a second album that never saw release (edit: it finally did), and still have a small pile of songs that either never got finished or just weren’t ever given the final polish. Maybe someday. (edit: "someday" was July, 2012.)
As they say, life happens. People get older; things change. So it went for us. Our last show was December 15, 2006, with our good friends The Buttery Lords. Since then, biff has moved to Tucson, AZ, where he is working as a teacher. I’m unwilling to give up the rapping just yet, so I’ve taken my shit on the solo creep, under the group name Sticks Downey. I’m still Wockenfuss.
CAC continues to linger. We never broke up. I guess you could consider it an indefinite hiatus. I always like those.
If you ever saw us, heard us, liked us or heckled us, you’ve made me really happy. I mean that sincerely.
Wockenfuss (the taller one)
Updated: CAC's Triumphant 2012 Return
On July 6, 2012, we got CAC back together and played a reunion show at the Ash St. Theater in Portland. We also dug deep into the vaults, pulling out countless odds and ends that had been collecting dust over the years. We assembled a rarities collection, The Heel Turn, which was released digitally right before the show, and we also did a limited pressing of what was supposed to be our sophomore album, Simple Tricks and Nonsense.
The show was a lot of fun, and many lives were touched. No word on whether it will ever happen again.
Sly Appearances:
Simple Tricks and Nonsense CD (2012)
Download/buy limited-edition CD from Bandcamp.
- "Sky-Walkers Intro"
- "Similes Spread Like Disease"
- "Matt Nokes"
- "College Degreez"
- "Cancel One Career, McMahon (feat. KayBee and BAM the Diabetic Superhero)
- "Bill Madlock"
- "Sweet Stan Lane"
- "Ace Ebb (feat. ONUG and Oatmeal)"
- "Critical Theory"
- "Getting Worse with Time (feat. KayBee, BAM the Diabetic Superhero, Cullen Drain, and ONUG)"
- "63 Movies"
- "Bill Bixby"
- "Megaforce (feat. The Buttery Lords)"
- "Kenzie Kenzington"
- "Sparing No Feelings (feat. Cullen Drain)
- "1997"
- "Pardon Me, Ptooie (feat. Cullen Drain, Oatmeal, ONUG, BAM the Diabetic Superhero, and KayBee)"
The Heel Turn (2012)
Download free from Bandcamp.
- "Sky-Walkers Intro
- "The Practice of Beer Before Sleep"
- "Matt Nokes"
- "Sweet Stan Lane"
- "Dumb it Up"
- "Deke DaSilva (feat. Cullen Drain and BAM the Diabetic Superhero)"
- "Dizz Hicks" [Link to video]
- "Is Gresham in the House?"
- "Bar the Door, Katie (feat. Oatmeal)"
- "1997"
- "Lance Parrish"
- "Crybaby (feat. ONUG)"
- "Check the Mise en Scène"
- "Watermelon Pickles"
- "Megaforce (feat. The Buttery Lords)"
- "Kenzie Kenzington"
- "Did You Hear That, Eyeball?"
- "The Therapy Session"
- "What's the Matter, Danielle?"
- "Roman Polanski (feat. ONUG)"
- "College Degreez"
- "Barry Windham"
- "Pardon Me, Ptooie (feat. Cullen Drain, Oatmeal, ONUG, BAM the Diabetic Superhero, and KayBee)"
Live at the Tonic Lounge: 10.09.04 (2012)
Download free from Bandcamp.
- "The Practice of Beer Before Sleep"
- "Similes Spread Like Disease"
- "Matt Nokes"
- "Biff Credits the Force"
- "Deke DaSilva (feat. Cullen Drain)"
- "Dizz Hicks"
- "63 Movies"
- "Sweet Stan Lane"
- "Sparing No Feelings (feat. Cullen Drain)"
- "Kenzie Kenzington"
- "College Degreez"
- "Cancel One Career, McMahon"
- "Getting Worse with Time (feat. Dr. Dold and Cullen Drain)"
- "Antarctica"
- "Tonic Ambience"
Cool As Cucumbers CD (2001)
Download free or buy CD from Bandcamp.
- "CAC Intro"
- "Similes Spread Like Disease"
- "Cancel One Career, McMahon" (feat. KayBee and BAM)
- "Playin' Pepper" (feat. Oatmeal)
- "Bill Bixby"
- "Sparing No Feelings" (feat. C-Dog)
- "Critical Theory"
- "63 Movies"
- "Bill Madlock" [Link to video]
- "Wine and Sake" (feat. Stepdaddy)
- "Getting Worse With Time" (feat. Half N Half, C-Dog, and ONUG)
- "Sideways 8"
- "Col. DeBeers"
- "You Blew It" (feat. BAM the Diabetic Superhero)
- "Antarctica"
Bonus Material:
Check out a list of all known CAC shows here.
Tons of old pics and lots more stuff on our obligatory Facebook page.
Complete lyrics to the Cool As Cucumbers CD are here.